so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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