You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
