Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
