I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
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