he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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