You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize