i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
There's even glitter on my cock...
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
