In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I am one with the molecules
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
i out mim tonsoeep
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