I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
areolas are like halos for boobs.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
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