But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
