Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
