yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Randomize