Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
Tornado booty call.. dedication
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize