Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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