How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I believe in your delicious
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
