This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
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