Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Randomize
