fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
