Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
