Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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