yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Randomize
