my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
