I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
