Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
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