3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
