We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
