if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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