I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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