I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Randomize
