You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
