Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
ugly people sure do ruin things
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
