Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
He passed out mid-signature
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Boobs speak an international language.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
