What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
I'm bleeding and have questions
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
