oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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