Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Randomize
