My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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