shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Randomize