Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Randomize
