Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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