she woke up with a sticky ear
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
