yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Randomize