i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
i used baking grease as lip gloss
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
