Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
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