i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize