There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Randomize
