So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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