brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
