it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Randomize