i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
