Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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