What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
